COLUMBIA, Mo. — Washington Redskins quarterback Chase Daniel, of the Fabled and Mighty Mizzou Powerhouse Football program, says he's not getting his fair shake by the Redskins organization as there has been nary a mention of his coming into the organization and gunning for Jason Campbell's top spot.
One of the subplots of the 2009 Draft was the possibility of Campbell being traded for USC heartthrob Mark "Dirty" Sanchez, leading to polite discomfort between the franchise (?) quarterback and the Redskins' front office.
"I mean, I'm here to win!" bellowed Daniel, at a press conference held at the local Western Sizzlin' in Columbia. "I'm tall enough, I'm- More hushpuppies, please?- I've got a great arm, and I- Gravy. Gravy, yes- I hold records at Muh-freakin-zoo."
"I'm the total package," said Daniel, immediately prior to noticeable discomfort due to one or several chicken bones lodged in Daniel's jowls.
Campbell spoke candidly about the incident.
"It definitely was a shock," Campbell said, "when I started hearing Sanchez talk."
"It's an awkward situation," Campbell answered, "just because after the Cutler deal, we did sit down and talk -- and then the Sanchez talk came up."
When reminded that the topic was to be focused on the arrival of actual competition in the form of Chase Daniel, Campbell began laughing hysterically, ending the interview, but not before conceding he "couldn't remember what that midget looks like."
Fellow 'Skins QBs Colt Brennan and Todd Collins could not be interviewed as they were busy popping towels and chasing each other in the locker room.