Monday, April 27, 2009

QB Chase Daniel Miffed At Lack of Mention in Campbell/Sanchez Redskin QB Debacle

COLUMBIA, Mo. — Washington Redskins quarterback Chase Daniel, of the Fabled and Mighty Mizzou Powerhouse Football program, says he's not getting his fair shake by the Redskins organization as there has been nary a mention of his coming into the organization and gunning for Jason Campbell's top spot.

One of the subplots of the 2009 Draft was the possibility of Campbell being traded for USC heartthrob Mark "Dirty" Sanchez, leading to polite discomfort between the franchise (?) quarterback and the Redskins' front office.

"I mean, I'm here to win!" bellowed Daniel, at a press conference held at the local Western Sizzlin' in Columbia. "I'm tall enough, I'm- More hushpuppies, please?- I've got a great arm, and I- Gravy. Gravy, yes- I hold records at Muh-freakin-zoo."

"I'm the total package," said Daniel, immediately prior to noticeable discomfort due to one or several chicken bones lodged in Daniel's jowls.

Campbell spoke candidly about the incident.

"It definitely was a shock," Campbell said, "when I started hearing Sanchez talk."

"It's an awkward situation," Campbell answered, "just because after the Cutler deal, we did sit down and talk -- and then the Sanchez talk came up."

When reminded that the topic was to be focused on the arrival of actual competition in the form of Chase Daniel, Campbell began laughing hysterically, ending the interview, but not before conceding he "couldn't remember what that midget looks like."

Fellow 'Skins QBs Colt Brennan and Todd Collins could not be interviewed as they were busy popping towels and chasing each other in the locker room.


  1. I wish Chase the best of luck, I mean he made Mizzou football relevant. (maybe not much longer, we'll see how this kid from Parkway works out) But I think he's going the way of the Major Applewhite. Chase, go to camp, bust your ass, get your paycheck. When the NFL doesn't want you anymore, you can pick up a great GA gig somewhere or put that business degree to work.

  2. Chase Daniel is no Major Applewhite and if you think so you are kidding yourself. Maybe Chase can use that business degree to go into hair gel sales or invest his paycheck in some yard equipment so he can take care of Major's lawn. At least that way he could move to Austin and get the hell out of Missouri where god knows he wouldn't have gone if he had had better options to begin with. Enjoy your season Chase because god knows Dan Snyder would burn a village of women and children to replace his whole stable of shitty quarterbacks if he could.

    Next Year coming to your local Six Flags "Catch with a former Redskins Quarterback" featuring you guessed it: chase daniel, colt brennan, jason campbell, todd collins, etc etc etc

  3. UT fans (Icehouse excuded) please remove your mouth from the cock of Applewhite for one second, dust off your knees, and talk football (FOR ONCE)

    My point was not to rip on Major (Always liked him) or to compare him to Daniels. That would be foolish, we all know Daniels was a much better college QB. If you want to have a debate of Chase vs. Applewhite we can do that, and you will lose.

    My point was to suggest that Daniels may choose to become a college coach, just like your beloved Applewhite. (He's expressed interest in doing so) This analogy should have been clear since I used the term "GA" as in graduate assistant, you know an entry level coach. You would also assume that the knowledgeable fans at UT would realize that Major did the same thing at UT, where he later received an OC job at Rice, Alabama, and returning to Texas as a RB coach. But then again, it may have been too much for a Texas fan to realize the analogy, or to even remember their coaching staff.

    And when is Jason Campbell shitty.

    Ok sorry, you can now return to your blanket statements, and biased uninformed opinions.

  4. "...You've never seen a man so large shrink so quickly as when he is called on in class."

    ADDENDUM: Or when challenged by one Steve Lattimer.

  5. Jason Campbell is not shitty, people just can't handle a stationary black QB.

    Applewhite > Daniels. Applewhite was also an assistant with the Patriots for a little while.

    Like most fanbases, we don't all know a lot about football, but collectively, we just think we do.

  6. We'll continue to disagree on Daniels and Applewhite, sure he's a system player, but on my zenastic zen travels in the football world I ask: who isn't a system player?

    I won't go into statistics or football awards with stiff arming trophy's because that would be too easy. But I will say that Daniels (product of Texas' increasingly superior QB crop) but I will say that Daniels (in his situation) was a vastly superior QB to Major.

    Put it this way If I'm starting a CFB team and I have to choose between the two, I'm going with Daniels.

    I'd also like to add that Daniels worked with lesser players at Mizzou, and Applewhite is essentially known for One, maybe two games. It also has nothing to do with homerism, however it has a lot to do with watching the game, and using logic.

    Applewhite is also going to make a major splash in coaching fairly soo. He knows the X's and O's, but Mack attack is teaching him how to be a CEO of a program. I'd look for him to make a move to UT OC and eventually a head coach at a smaller level school. (Think Houston, UTEP, Rice, Baylor with his recruiting ties.)

    Jason Campbell? I know a lot of NFL teams that would love to have him right now.

  7. With all do respect to the TGORH writers (i feel all of yall could work for the onion) while Daniels is a fiery guy, he is an awful and overrated quarterback maclin made mizzou football relevant, daniels made mizzou football gay

  8. Anon:








  9. Also:

    This has gone waaaayyyyy beyond homerism, and now we're treading in the realm of football logic/reason.

  10. I think we can all agree on this point:

    Neither Chase Daniel nor Major Applewhite deserve this much pixel in the comments section of this or any blog.

    Has anyone else seen the Golf Channel show with Charles Barkley? HOW HAVE WE NOT DISCUSSED THIS AD NASEUM?!

  11. Never compared the on field play of Chase Daniel and Major Applewhite AT ALL. Your comparison was to Chase's future plans and my response (hair gel sales mowing major's lawn etc) was directed at his life after graduating.

    While in my opinion Chase was never the QB that he was built up to be, my comment was regarding his potential coaching ability. He will never be half the coach Major will be (note recognition of coaching talent by numerous very successful coaches). Clearly I am biased but Lattimer the only thing that could make you like Chase more would be if he was a Pennsylvania cement plant worker before playing at Mizzou.

    My comment was half to prove a point and half to laugh and the idea of Lattimer shitting himself and pulling his hair out when he read it.

    And finally Jason Campbell is not a Good quarterback he just happens to be in a situation where he has been Just Good Enough to keep his job. Obviously talented but I think it seems clear that his future in this league is as a backup.

    Apologize for the delayed response apparently the major contributers here are much more responsive than I.... shocking as it may seem

  12. "Jason Campbell is not a Good quarterback."

    No interceptions for half a season is pretty good.

  13. Fine, we're debating coaching.

    I normally don't like bashing coaches, but perhaps one day (if chase goes into coaching) he could surpass Major's epic 14 point performance against the juggernaut that is Louisiana Monroe.

    And like I said earlier, this is not homeristic, just logic.

    "And finally Jason Campbell is not a Good quarterback he just happens to be in a situation where he has been Just Good Enough to keep his job. Obviously talented but I think it seems clear that his future in this league is as a backup."

    Wow.... just wow.

  14. His nickname is "Lips" and he plays for the Redskins...