Monday, February 16, 2009

Monday Morning S--t Storm

Presidents day Hobbsonians

So for this Storm I think we need to remember our countries great leaders.

Just kidding, this Storm will be much, much cooler.

Anyway there is a time honored tradition in sports, something that I consider a fine art.

Talking Shit.

I don't know, maybe it's the fact that I was so stoic on the field, but I absolutely admire players who can talk the finest shit in the world.

for the shit storm we need to determine the best trash talker in the land. I'm expecting great things, so do not let me down, but first I need to make my selection.

Chris Ellis:

Yes, just as Michelangelo used chisel and marble to create his works, Ellis uses verbs and nouns to construct his masterpieces.

You may not have heard of Ellis, he was a 4 year DE at Virginia Tech, and is a current member of the Bills. Ellis is a great player, but having watched him for the past four years, I can assure you he is a better shit talker. I knew Ellis was special when during the Gator Bowl his Freshman year he quite literally told everyone out in TV world to "Suck his dick." (Sadly there is no video)

Ellis is one of those rare breeds who can morph from an in your face F you type, to the composed intellectual shit talker you see in this video. The sad thing is we may never know the extent of Ellis' genius simply because of the sport he plays. NFL Films, please mike up Ellis for his entire playing career.

Back to the shit storm, best trash talker: any player, any sport.....and since I'm in such a good mood today, after you make one selection I will allow "fictional trash talkers."

and remember the Ghost will be watching your work closely...Stay tuned.


  1. I think I'll start it off with the king. Rasheed Wallace.

    His crowning achievement was during his run of setting the record for the most technicals in one season. At one point in time, during "Bill Walton Bobblehead Night" in Portland, the crowd turned on the refs, throwing their bobbleheads onto the court. The camera, and the mic in the rim caught the following transaction:

    Ref: Don't try me, Rasheed.

    Sheed: I ain't sayin' nothing. They throwin' Bill Walton's ugly ass at you.

    The best part? Bill Walton was announcing the game.

  2. My second selection is myself.

    Fuck you, you cheese-faced bitches.

  3. I'm also going to have to throw in Bill Romonawski. I'd imagine that he threatened to kill several people, and if he loses the pissing match he can always just spit in your face.

    /roid raged

  4. Ok since I made two legit picks, here is the real reason I started the shit storm.

    I cried when Mack broke his leg

  5. Michael Jordan.

    If you need an explanation, you need to do some research on your own.

    Seriously, Michael Jordan was a bully.

  6. good call on MJ, I still remember him owning starks.

  7. Michael Irvin.

    Don't think I need to say more than that.

  8. I believe boxing must be recognized for its numerous contributions.
    Muhammad Ali practically invented talking shit, but Mike Tyson took it to the next level with "I wanna eat his children"

  9. Also, Tad from the South Park sode (thats for you Icehouse) "Asspen".
    Few insults have stood up to the elegant and simple, "Stan Darsh"

  10. Izzy Mandelbaum invented talking shit by calling grown men string bean and butterball in the early 20's.

    I also nominate Abe Lincoln. He scrawled the Gettysburg Address on a piece of toilet paper on a train, and then freed the slaves. Powerful words there but let us not forget those vaunted Lincoln-Davis debates, in which Lincoln most assuredly threw down the gauntlet. HAPPY BURFDAY ABE.

    Oh yeah, Journeyman C Pudge Rodriguez likes to talk shit to other people of Spanish descent when they're up to bat. That way the ump can't call him on anything.

  11. It is 4:45 EST. and there is still no mention of Neon and Deangelo hall.

    For shame hobbers, for shame.

  12. now I'm going personal, One time I told a ref to go f himself right after one of my friends (uno) got a clear touchdown called back at the end of the half. (he crossed the f-ing line...a giant yellow line that signified the endzone) Then someone told me he played at Mizzou so I better listen. I then proceeded to make fun of Mizzou.

    I realize this is not funny to anyone, but at the time I was going insane, which is always entertaining.

  13. I'm going to go with Gary Payton a.k.a the glove a.k.a "im going to take yo shit and let you know about it."

    also, on a personal level, my basketball team this year, we have over 10 technical fouls on the it.

  14. How many games? The team I played on probably beats that. I didn't pick myself for no reason.

  15. This is all fine and good, but the real question:

    Joey how many games have you been ejected from?

    If I was a Basketball coach I don't know how I could control the urge of: "Oh shit Grey's Anatomy is on right Tivo...fuck it I'm gone."

  16. 23 games...I have been ejected from two games in my lifetime.