Monday, November 17, 2008

Monday Morning Shit Storm

(Click for intro music)

FINALLY the Lattimer HAS COME BACK to GRH.

The Lattimer says this; The Lattimer loves wrestling. Wrestling was a great way to chill out after a long day of classes in eighth grade.

So for the shit storm The Lattimer was going to ask you jabroni's who's you're favorite wrestler. But then the Lattimer thought to himself: Lattimer that's way too hard for these weak candy assess.

So The Lattimer says this: There are two great periods of wrestling. Wrestling when The Lattimer was in K-2 and when The Lattimer was in grades 6-8. The Lattimer says: you punk assess should choose one from each period.

The Lattimer says: My favorite of all time Is The Rock


However, The Lattimer also has a special place in his heart for Rowdy Roddy Piper.

Hotrod was always a lone wolf, and The Lattimer respected that

Oh, Wait Wait Wait. Is The Lattimer mistaken?

You Didn't watch professional wrestling?

During middle school you watched Dawson's Creek and other shitty shows on the WB?

Well I tell you what, The Lattimer says this: you can take The W and the B shine them both up real nice, turn that sonbitch sideways and STICK IT STRAIGHT UP YOUR CANDY ASS!!!!

So GRH readers are you ready to go one on one with the great one?

The Lattimer asks this question: Who do YOU think are the best pro wrestlers?























IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK

54 comments:

  1. Randy "Macho Man" Savage, especially when he flexed his theatrical muscles in the blockbuster Spiderman as the semi-pro wrestler "Bonesaw." His memorable line was "Bonesaw is READY!"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPa29sxMM6E&feature=related

    The stretch for Savage was having to act like he would ever get beat up by Toby Maguire, with or without spider-strength.

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  2. Bonus points if you remain in character as your favorite wrestler throughout the entire day.

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  3. Razor Ramon and Diesel back before they turned gay and left for the WCW and became Scott Hall and Kevin Nash.

    The Outsiders were so fierce. The crucifix suplex was amazing. Kevin "Diesel" Nash has the best powerbomb in history.

    I most recently saw Kevin Nash in Grandma's Boy. "Yeah, they'll massage your cock for money. Pretty sure that makes them hookers."

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  4. I'm frankly quite surprised that it took us this long to bring up pro wrestling. And somebody needs to get Don Delaware on the phone so he can weigh in on this.

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  5. I'd also like to add my honorable mentions:

    Goldberg
    Chris Jericho
    Ultimate Warrior

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  6. The Undertaker. Both generations. The Tombstone was uncanny.

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  7. Also, the Rock was only cool when he was a heel. Once everybody started liking him he started to suck.

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  8. In seventh grade, like fifteen of us all wore the same NWO shirt for school picture day. In the yearbook, Benton Middle School's seventh graders had at least two NWO shirts on every page.


    Thunder Lips from "Rocky III" is one of my all-time favorites.

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  9. I'll take Stone Cold over Goldberg any day.

    Anybody remember "Gillberg?"

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  10. Ice house that is a good point

    Feel free to add you're favorite tag team.

    I have a tie between harlem heat and the dudley boys

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  11. Diamond Dallas Page.

    Feel the bang.

    Disco Inferno?

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  12. Rey Mysterio, Jr.

    Chavo Guerrero.

    Captain Insano (he shows no moicy).

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  13. No, The rock was always cool. The problem was when he was a heel he was mainly in bed with Vince. Although he was great when he was in the nation of domination.

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  14. I hate DDP Goldberg totally kicked his ass

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  15. I also feel like stone cold was a bigger modern version of hotrod

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  16. I liked Stone Cold in his post-retirement days and/or when he was injured. It pretty much consisted of him coming out in cut off shorts, a random tee-shirt, perhaps a knee brace, camo hat and copious amounts of beer.

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  17. The Edge. Actually, the whole Brood.

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  18. Oh, and the best tag team of all time was the Road Dogg Jessie James and Bad Ass Billy Gunn. Although I got kind of tired of seeing Gunn's ass all the time.

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  21. Val Venis was great. I also loved Raven and the entire flock

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  22. El Tejano and his son, El Tejano, Jr.

    I went to a Mexican pro wrestling match last year, Lucha Libre. It was mind-boggling. The craziest dude was named Dr. Wagner. He came out in a lab coat, had a green mask, and basically looked like the big green henchman that gets fueled by ragejuice that is controlled by Uma Thurman in that one batman.




    /sits in the corner to cry.

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  23. The henchman to whom you refer is Bane. Bane killed the original Batman. Mad props to Bane.

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  24. Speaking of Bane, while I was a huge undertaker fan, I never liked Kane. Except for that one time he got set on fire.

    And yes, I did attend a legit Lucha Libre. It cost 100 pesos.


    Bam Bam Bigelow.

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  25. It's a sad day when there is any conversation about wrestling and The Nature Boy Rick Flair is not mentioned (for one reason or another)

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  26. Rick Flair is on the same level as Hogan.

    They both suck

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  27. Please see the aforementioned praise of one Thunder Lips from Rocky III. That's Hogan. And no one messes with Thunder Lips, Lattimer. No one.

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  28. Rick Flair is old and gross. Him trying to be a wrassler after the 80s was just sad.

    What's messed up is that we have only referenced a couple of people from Degeneration X. Shawn Michaels is awesome, Triple H was cool for a moment. XPac was awesome up until he showed up on a VH1 reality show to try and do pills with Chyna.

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  29. Ok I didn't want to bring this up but what is so great about hogan? Honestly tell me because I never got the Hogan BJ party. He claims to do everything right. See. "I am a real American." Yet he took steroids, did drugs and probably drank much more than milk. I'll say it right now. Fuck Hogan.

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  30. DX was ok in their early years. I just don't like wrestling groups such as DX or NWO black/red. However, LWO was great.

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  31. Throw the four horsemen in there as well as groups that are stupid.

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  32. And I'll say this. It broke my heart when sting chose NWO wolfpack. Not because I liked the original NWO, but because I was expecting him to go apeshit on all of them with his bat.

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  33. Yeah. Sting was great as a loner, I didn't see him fitting in well with the Wolfpack. But the WCW sucks, so whatever.


    Buff Bagwell and Scott Steiner were pretty funny, though.

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  34. Big papa pump is your hookup holla if ya hear me.

    Litle did we know that the hookup was steroids and cocaine.

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  35. I'd also just like to back up Icehouse's comment that Shawn Michaels is in fact awesome

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  36. 1st of all the only cool thing about wrestling was the WCW vs. NWO game for N64. Secondly there are so many pathetically funny wrestlers that have remained entirely unmentioned.

    http://www.comedy.com/blog/2008/10/20/the-13-worst-pro-wrestling-gimmicks-ever/

    I would also like to say that I think monster truck driving is a far superior sport to wrestling. Obviously I use this term "sport" loosely.

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  37. White yao: Fuck your monster truck driving.

    That is all

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  38. I agree, White Yao: Compared to wrestling monster truck is for the gays.

    Yes I've been to both.

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  39. no its not too soon zack.

    In fact if you remember my fantasy team last summer was called:

    "Hangin with Benoit"

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  40. this blog was almost titled "Hangin with the Benoits."

    It would have been too soon, though.

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  41. I remember that, how young and naive. GRH is much better

    Site meter says so

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  42. Laura is hott, with a double-t for emphasis.

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  43. Maybe pro wrestling and monster trucks can merge into one sport. It would be a much more entertaining version of demolition derby.


    Lattimer take off the macho man tank top, spit out the slim jim, and remove the cement dildo from your ass

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  44. As noted earlier I do not favor the macho man.

    A more accurate statement would be for me to remove my kilt and take the bagpipes out of my ass.

    Also, there is nothing, and I mean nothing, as cool as a demo derby.

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  45. "Monday Night Rehabilitation" from 'Idiocracy' is a combination of Monster Trucks, Demo Derby, and pro wrestling.

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  46. Someone needs to show Mark Cuban Idiocracy so he will make it happen.

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