As many of you know, I like to categorize people. I like saying ahhh yes, you are this person, and I will lump you in with these types of people. Wrong? Perhaps. Entertaining? Hell and yes.
As a result, I'm always trying to expand my list (my current project is the various types of Beer rep girls seen at a beer distributor). But I enjoy some Hobber Help.
Soooo for the shit storm: We're going to categorize people met/seen at sporting events.
My first selection:
The Beer Snob.
Let me tell you a story. A young strapping lad is awakened by a friend telling him that he will be competing in a golf scramble (best ball....score). In the ensuing chaos of trying to get a team together, the young lad is charged with procuring the foursome with malted beverages for the day.
Now if you've never been into a beer mart, I'll give you some help. Typically there is going to be two sections: high class and domestic. Once in the domestic section, you have three aisle areas: specialty, middle class, and low grade. The young man had a little over $20 to work with. So, do you grab a 12 pack of some nice stuff? A cube of domestic? Or roll the dice and grab 2 cubes of the Natty?
Hmmmm, it is hot outside.....we will be going to a BBQ after this.....Yes, 60 beers for a little over 24 dollars is a good thing.
The foursome rejoiced.
And do you know who that man was?
Mitch Comstein, he was a good guy.
But honestly, I'm tired of getting accosted for enjoying a domestic beer. "I can't believe you guys are drinking those." Really? Because I'm pretty sure this is why stuff like Natty was created. It's so watered down that you can pound 12 of them in 90 degree heat and still function. Hell, that stuff is like Gatorade.
Problem is this guy and gal usually surface at sporting events. If you're with some pros, a whole row can get served from one beer man stop. But no, not the beer snob. He's going to wait until microbrew guy comes around and drop $12.50 on a 12 ounce cup just so he can sniff that hoppy aroma. What's worse is the guy has to bring his cute little 6 pack of pale ale to a tailgate. Let's think about what this means. The beer you provided. The beer you bought for everyone. The FREE BEER TO BE ENJOYED BY THE MASSES is not good enough for this guy. No, he is going to use your cooler and wait for his "porter stout from a small little microbrewery in upstate NY" to chill and silently mock you as you sip off the foam of your silver bullet.
I get it, there is a reason that beer costs so much money. It is significantly better than domestics, but never....ever mock the domestics.
Ok, so for those of you who didn't read any of that, for the shit storm give us the types of people you meet at sporting events.