Tonight is the BCS Mythical National Championship, you may have heard about this.
Instead of making predictions on who will win, today we'll pick teams and present an argument on WHY that team SHOULD win.
I'm picking Auburn. Why? Well first of all we have the whole Under Armour Vs. Nike thing.
BRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHM (SYMBOLISM) BRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHM
But honestly with the insane amount of money Phil Knight has given to Oregon, I want the world to know that you can't buy a championsh.....Oh wait.
That's the next reason I wan't Auburn to win. I wan't the hypocrisy of the NCAA on full display to the world. Furthermore, seeing Auburn win would cause a moral and ethical dilemma for everyone in the SEC. Do you want to Chant SEC (west) SEC (west) knowing full well Cam was signed sealed and delivered. Do you hope for the vacated wins later on so you can still use the "we beat you on the field" argument? Can you handle a year of Auburn Fans gloating every chance they get?
watching this would be like watching a sick psych experiment.
Ok, let's hear your reasoning.
Begin.
Monday, January 10, 2011
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Oregon, because it would be different. Or something.
ReplyDeleteI like the Auburn winning, and vacated wins idea. Because let's be real, their season won't count. Another thing I'd like with Auburn winning is just to show how vapid and hollow every SEC fan's life really is, in that they truly believe in nothing if they gloat about Tebow winning, gloat about Alabama winning, then gloat about Cam winning.
SEC Fan: HERP A DERP WE GOOD AT FOOTBALL.
Icehouse: What makes you good? Christian virgin quarterback? Great defense and run game? Corruption?
SEC Fan: ALL WE DO IS WIN YOU CAIN'T COMPETE DERP A DERP
I want Auburn to win, but for the exact same reasons Icehouse stated. The consternation levels among everyone who isn't in the SEC will be at an ungodly high.
ReplyDeleteI guess I don't want Oregon to win, because they are Oregon.
ReplyDeleteThe thing about the SEC is that they'll Derp Derp regardless. Like if Oregon wins tonight they'll still talk about beating "powerhouses" like Michigan State, Michigan, Penn State, and aTm.
SEC fans are like the guy who's self worth comes from being really good at beer pong.
That's such a pathetic way to look at life. If Auburn beats Oregon, that means that Auburn is better than Oregon. It has no bearing on the adequacy of any other team in the conference.
ReplyDeleteA friend of mine plays the drums for Asleep at the Wheel. Under an SEC fan's thinking, I must also be a kick-ass drum player. I'm not, and that thinking is retarded.
Go Ducks. Thanks for convincing me.
Another thing, SEC fans think that the entire country is out for SEC blood. This is also faulty. First and foremost, I don't give a shit about the SEC. I rooted for LSU to beat the Aggies, because I like watching the Aggies lose. This is what makes me a "good fan." Loyalty.
ReplyDeleteThe only time a news byline in the southeast exists is during the fall, because nothing of note happens there outside of college football. The nation pays attention to southeastern college football, because they have many of the top teams. Sure. The thing is, nobody gives two flying fucks about you, because we have our own regional college football teams that we grew up with. A Penn State fan doesn't wake up in the morning thinking about the SEC. Lattimer's out to get tOSU. I'm out to get OU. If SEC fans were actually good fans, then Alabama fans would be out to get Aubrun. But, lo and behold, they're not.
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ReplyDeleteWell it's tough to hate on teams like Alabama, Auburn, LSU, Florida. But it's pretty easy for every other team. Like the ones who lose to tOSU.
ReplyDelete*point of order. I hate UVA.
So you wouldn't hate Arkansas if they had beaten tOSU, right?
ReplyDeleteNo I would hate on them. It's just very convenient at the moment.
ReplyDeleteI also like how Tennessee fans think they are in the upper echelon of the conference.
They only get to because they were led to a National Championship by their vaunted QB Peyton Manni, I mean, Tee Martin.
ReplyDeleteHERP A DERP WE GOOD AT FOOTBALL.
ReplyDeleteALL WE DO IS WIN YOU CAIN'T COMPETE DERP A DERP