Some of the other Blogs I've seen do this thing called an "open thread," similar to the MMSS or CC or other acronyms we here at the Ghost of Roy Hobbs endorse. I was going to write something about it, but I'd rather here it from you:
What did you think of the game last night? Any pissed of Mormons out there?
Comment and discuss amongst yourselves.
Posts
Let's Use the BCS computers...put the top 4 teams on a board...and throw a fucking dart.
ReplyDeleteI like Tim Tebow because we both like Jesus. John 3:16, man.
ReplyDeleteFuck mormons.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, there's a pervasive culture of sexual deviance and female submission that should have died out by now. But no.
You bunch of child-touching faggots.
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ReplyDeleteThanks to all of you for your submissions to Tebowisms.net
Go Gators!!
o Tim Tebow doesn't get rained on, the rain gets Tim Tebow'ed.
o Tim Tebow fought the law.....and won.
o Tim Tebow doesnt make first downs, first downs come to him.
o Tim Tebow walked before he crawled.
o Tim Tebow doesn't sleep, he just goes into stand-by.
o God made the world in six days, then rested on the 7th because 5 of those 6 were spent making Tim Tebow.
o After the Gators beat Oklahoma in the championship game, Nike changed their slogan to- "Just do it...like Tim Tebow!"
o Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Tim Tebow.
o If Tim Tebow were a superhero, he'd be... Tim Tebow.
o Humans pray to God, God prays to Tim Tebow.
o The Incredible Hulk doesn't want to make Tim Tebow angry.
o Tebow spiked the ball after the 2007 BCS bowl game; creating what we now know as the Grand Canyon.
o Tim Tebow once allowed a fortune teller to read his palm. Unfortunately, she did not see it coming.
o Tim Tebow once did a thousand one arm push-ups, with both arms tied behind his back.
o Tim Tebow has no pubic hair. Hair can�t grow on balls of steel.
o It wasn't an asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs, it was Tim Tebow.
o When Oprah needs advice she asks Tim Tebow.
o The average person gets 200 points for writing your name on the SAT. Tim Tebow got 1600.
o Tim Tebow is the not the Bronko Nagurski of 2008. He wouldn�t need a plow to turn a field. He�d do it by hand.
o When Tim Tebow holds the Heisman, it puts down its stiff arm.
o Tim Tebow taught the "2 Bits" cheer to George Edmondson
o The light at the end of the tunnel isn't a freight train, it's Tim Tebow.
o Tim Tebow played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
o The NCAA declared that Tim Tebow may lose his amateur status because he is a professional ass kicker.
o God wanted to create the world in 10 days, Tim Tebow gave him 6.
o Tim Tebow once got Blackjack with one card.
o Tim Tebow's hand is the only hand that beats a Royal Flush.
o Life doesn't give Tim Tebow lemons. Life asks him which fruit he wants.
o When you open a can of whoop-ass, Tim Tebow jumps out.
o Tim Tebow can eat just one Lay's Potato Chip. Don't tell Tim what he can't do.
o Tim Tebow played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
o It takes Tim Tebow 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
o Tim Tebow doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
o Archeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined 'victim' as 'one who has encountered Tim Tebow
o Tim Tebow' house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
o When Tim Tebow was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he threw a football at the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
o When Tim Tebow calls 1-900 numbers, he doesnt get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.
o If it looks like beef, smells like beef, and tastes like beef, but Tim Tebow says it’s chicken. You better believe its chicken.
o Tim Tebow loves women. All of them. At the same time.
o Tim Tebow pummels that bridge when he gets to it.
o Tim Tebow laughs when you hit him in the funnybone.
o Superman is the Tim Tebow of superheroes.
o Tim Tebow can be at two places at once.
o Tim Tebow doesn't punch in to work. He stiff arms.
o Before going on stage for his first theatrical role, Tim Tebow was told, "Break a leg." The entire cast was carted to the hospital minutes later.
o Mit Wobet was the first man to spell his name backwards.
o Tim Tebow wrote a book called "The Tim Tebow Experience". Readers opened the book and received a pop-out stiff arm to the face.
o Tim Tebow can eat five times his body weight in tigers.
o Tim Tebow won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal. He thinks yellow wristbands are gay.
o Tim Tebow could drink 24 gallons of milk in an hour without throwing up if wanted. He chooses not to because the calcium would make his bones so strong he would instantly kill anyone he touched.
o Tim Tebow' house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
o What color is Tim Tebow's blood? Trick question. Tim Tebow does not bleed.
o Tim Tebow ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
o Tim Tebow is helping Santa this year, no reindeers needed and he'll be finished before midnight.
o When Tebow scores a touchdown it's worth 7 points without the extra point kick, but he always gives one back in the spirit of being a missionary.
o Tim Tebow can get Chick-Fil-A on Sundays.
o Companies that produce solar powered products are studying Tim Tebow because he can always find daylight.
o If at first you don't succeed...you are not Tim Tebow.
o Michigan players have been caught around campus running into brick walls and trying to bring down lampposts. Unfortunately they will still not be prepared to tackle Tim Tebow.
o When Tim Tebow does push ups, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the world down.
o When the bogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks the closet for Tim Tebow.
o People with amnesia still remember Tim Tebow.
o Tim Tebow's family once threw him a surprise party. Once.
o Tim Tebow hits blackjack with just one card.
o The only reason you're still conscious is because Tim Tebow hasn't stiff-armed you in the face.
o When Tim Tebow was a kid, he made his mom finish his vegetables.
o Superman's only weakness is kryptonite. Tim Tebow laughs at Superman for even HAVING a weakness.
o Tim Tebow doesn't do pushups. Instead, he pushes the earth down.
o Superman wears Tim Tebow pajamas.
o Tim Tebow counted to infinity. Twice.
o In the beginning there was nothing. Then Tim Tebow stiff-armed that nothing in the head and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
o When life gives Tim Tebow lemons, he uses them to kill terrorists. Tim Tebow hates lemonade.
o When Google can't find something, it asks Tim Tebow for help.
o What color is Tim Tebow's blood? Trick question. Tim Tebow does not bleed.
o Tim Tebow has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars.
o Tim Tebow once stiff-armed a horse. That animal became what is now known as the giraffe.
o Tim Tebow is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
o Tim Tebow is the reason Waldo is hiding
o When Tim Tebow wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
o When taking the SAT, write "Tim Tebow" for every answer. You will score more than 1600.
o Tim Tebow can dribble a football.
o Tim Tebow was once asked to repeat himself. The last thing that person ever heard was the whooshing sound of a stiff-arm.
o Tim Tebow can kick start a car.
o Tim Tebow gets called for roughing the tackler.
o When Tebow spikes the ball, he strikes oil.
o Barry Bonds didnt take steroids, he injected tim tebows saliva.
o Tim Tebow scares the grim reaper to death.
o You can lead a horse to water, but Tim Tebow can make him drink.
o Tim Tebow doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
o Tim Tebow can get breakfast at McDonald's after 10:30 A.M.
o Tim tebow once sneezed at the line of scrimmage and knocked over a linebacker.
o The Heisman Trophy won Tim Tebow.
o David didn’t beat Goliath, Tim Tebow did.
o When Tim Tebow drives the lights automatically turn green because he can’t be stopped.
o Tim Tebow’s the reason vampires don’t come out during the day.
o Police clocked Tim Tebow going 50 in a 25, only they couldn’t ticket him because he was running.
o Jimmy Hoffa is buried under the Meadowlands because he tried to tackle Tim Tebow and got run over.
o Tim Tebow wins a golf scramble, by himself.
o The speed limit on the University of Florida campus is 20 because that’s how many defenders Tim Tebow runs over on one play.
o Yoda never heard of the force until he met Tim Tebow.
o Rome wasn’t built in a day because Tim Tebow wasn’t born yet.
o When Tim Tebow eats, he doesn’t have to wait 30 minutes to swim.
o Freddy Krueger is scared to sleep because he might meet Tim Tebow in his dream.
o Tim Tebow’s number is 15 because that’s how many players it takes to tackle him.
o A meteor didn’t kill the dinosaurs; Tim Tebow did in a pickup football game.
o Referees created instant replay so they could admire Tim Tebow more than once.
o College football has the BCS instead of a playoff so only one team has to face Tim Tebow.
o Area 51 doesn’t study aliens, it studies Tim Tebow.
o "Godzilla" won't face Tim Tebow because Tim's too tough.
o Sony created PlayStation 3 because it was the only way to fit Tim Tebow’s greatness onto one screen.
o Ponce de Leon wasn’t looking for the fountain of youth; he was looking for Tim Tebow.
o “I am Legend” isn’t about the last man on Earth; it’s about Tim Tebow.
o Tim Tebow can eat just one Lay’s Potato Chip. Don’t tell Tim what he can’t do.
o The recent earthquake off the coast of Florida measured 6.0 on the Richter scale, or .024 Tim Tebows.
o Every time you hear a bell ring, an angel got a Tebow autograph.
o There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Tim Tebow lives in Florida.
o When Batman is in trouble, he turns on the Tim Tebow signal.
o God has a Tim Tebow complex.
o Tim Tebow invented the cesarian section when he jumped out of his moms stomach, he thought it was fourth and one.
o Tim Tebow saved the manatees. Then he stiff armed them back on the endandered species list so they wouldnt get cocky.
o Tim Tebow invented the pedestal. Then he invented the stiff arm to have something to knock people off it.
o A spike in Tim Tebow stiff arms caused the tooth fairy to go broke in 2007.
o An Ohio St Fan once told a joke at Tim Tebow's expense... well we all know what happened next.
o Tim Tebow told Steve Irwin not to mess with stingrays.
o You don't hit Tim Tebow, Tim Tebow hits you!
o Tim Tebow doesn't get sacked. Tim Tebow sacks defensive linemen.
o Tebow doesn't throw interceptions, he throws the ball to you so he can hit you on the return.
o Tim Tebow built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Tebow met all three bullets with his stiff arm, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
o Tim Tebow can touch MC Hammer.
o At birth, Tim Tebow came out arms first so he could stiff arm the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Tim Tebow but Tim Tebow.
o Tim Tebow sleeps with a night light. Not because Tim Tebow is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Tim Tebow.
o The quickest way to a man's heart is with Tim Tebow's forearm.
o Ray Lewis once was asked if he'd like to run full speed at Tim Tebow, and he said "No".
Stone Cold Tim Tebow himself has really proven that not only is he the best college quarterback ever...he has cemented my opinion that Ryan Leaf, Tim Couch, and Jason White were the 3 Upper Deck cards he carried with him while delivering a bad of foreskins to his father in the Phillipines. Good luck when the Detroit Lions draft you Tim.
ReplyDelete+1 Joe.
ReplyDeleteTebow is not going to enjoy running in the NFL.