Showing posts with label GRH fantasy football. Show all posts
Showing posts with label GRH fantasy football. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Hey What's Up




Salutations blood brothers and sisters, My name is Ted Nugent and fellow outdoorsman Steven Lattimer has blessed me with the opportunity to promote the Ghost of Roy Hobbs Fantasy Football League.


As we sit and ponder our existence it is easy to see how the distractions of our created reality can deter us from our natural roots to return to the wild and compete in ancient internet combat known as fantasy football. However it is our duty as blood brothers to not only preserve this sport, but to promote it to the young fantasy footballers so that future generations of wild men can have backstraps for years to come.

As you can see here my good buddy Lattimer has set us up with a prime location on the yahoo ranch in the heart of fantasy football country. We've been scouting this location for weeks and as you can see it is an absolute beauty. If you notice here to my right we have seen an Adrien Peterson walk up to this water hole and several Peyton Mannings have lurked around ole Uncle Ted's thumping radius.

/guitar solo

Now, some of you may be new to this wonderful sport, but do not fret new initiates. I have been lurking the fantasy football sites of my native Michigan for years as i have tracked and stalked football players since my earliest memories.

My instructions for you is to first stake out a functional yet breathtaking site as you begin your hunt. I suggest yahoo.

As you search for your query make sure to get a sense of your surroundings, pay attention to your injured lists, offensive styles, depth charts, and most importantly. THE WIND

Once you have settled down in the fantasy section of yahoo and are prepared to harvest your beast type in the league ID number and password which is
ID=495695
Password=GRH

As you type in those most important codes, notice the majestic draw of your left click button and the beautifully imperfect click of your arrow. Breath deeply as you sight your target and imagine yourself as the cursor to complete the task it is designed for , which is to puncture a best at an undetermined range.

Pay no attention to the draft status as it will be ever changing much like the wind. Instead think to yourself. "When do I want this draft to occur", only then will you know when the proper drafting time will occur.

And do not draft for the sake of drafting. Notice the power of your clicks, practice your clicks, become proficient at your clicks. You see drafting a playing shouldn't be performed by the uninitiated. Rather it should occur because your DNA, those tiny molecules that give us the beauty of human life, tell you to click. We draft because it's in our blood We draft because we seek a simpler time where we can simply be one with the wild. We draft because our fathers have drafted, and our children will one day cull the bounty of NFL players to ensure the future of our sport and lifestyle.

/shoots M-16
//mouth clicking

Thursday, August 19, 2010

GRH Fantasy League



(Click to set the mood)

You may wonder what this lovely artwork is doing on our website.

Well this is the portrait that resides on our private ESPN fantasy league front page.

I know what your thinking, and yes, I am a legend.

I went undefeated in fantasy football.

Against all odds I pulled off perfection, and now I have the privilege, nay, honor to open a bottle of champagne every time the last undefeated team loses in our league "Gamblingdogfightingsteroids"

Why is this relevant? Well first I think it's important that the world learns of my greatness. Secondly, I now present you the opportunity and honor to play me in fantasy football.

That's right it's GRH: The League

as always, the instructions are simple.

Log onto yahoo.

League ID=495695
Password=GRH

Now, if you've played with us before you know that we are pretty much open to anyone joining.

Don't know how to play, don't worry any mouthbreather can do it.

In fact last year we had a girl, who knew football, but first year playing absolutely beat the piss out of everyone week after week. I have no idea how she didn't win with the team she had.

Now, was she 14-0? No, but not many people are.

Second thing, and I really feel like I shouldn't have to address this, but the best part of fantasy is the team names.

Let's please keep them relevant and offensive as possible.

Lastly, don't worry about the draft right now, it will change numerous times and we'll keep you updated through the "hey what's up" announcements.

Thank You,

Steve "Mercury Morris" Lattimer

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

We all just got moose knuckle'd



Well we all got mooseknuckle'd. I should have seen this coming. I never got a beej in the alley of Neils, I never drank five gallons of vodka, and I never drove cross-country with Carmello Anthony so I don't know why I would expect to win a fantasy football league.

Mooseknuckle fooled us all with his football intuition. He came in as the last seed and proceeded to defeat myself, Brian, and oh so vulnerable Deafmute.

It is a true story he can tell for ages.

So in the tradition of GRH, raise your glasses to Mooseknuckle because he shoved that moose knuckle in all of our asses.

In other news we have a new contributor to GRH. Shabbychicblonde is going to be around to provide a "for the ladies" perspective that goes beyond the connection between Seagal and the notebook. Essentially she is the anti-Lattimer in that she 1. Is blonde 2. Writes well 3. Does not think Carhartt's and sweatpants are "in." (Although I have a feeling we both have a certain appreciation for Lady Gaga) Check out her blog Shabbychicblonde.

Well that is what we like to call a combo post in Hobberland. Keep living the dream.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Caption Contest



USA guy:"Ahhhhhh I got Brian Leonard in the 11th Round...YOU FOOLS!!! CHAMPIONSHIP!!!"
(actual pick)

or

Bears fan: "AHAHAHA I kept Sean Alexander and Reggie Bush. Those two ALONE will get me to the playoffs" (Actual keepers)

Perhaps.

Minnesota Wild fan: "Ahhhh yesth with the likesth of Maurice Jonesth Drew Larry Fisthgerald, and Romo Dragonsth will be totally unsthtopable thisth year."
(Actcual team name and roster for "Dragons")

Ok that sucked, you can do better. I do suggest you click on the image and zoom so you can see some of the team names and picks. I bet "Big Daddy" was regretting that draft two weeks into the season. But that's how it goes in fantasy....which reminds me.

There are still slots available for the GRH league.

Go to yahoo.

League ID=638653

Password=grh

The draft is tonight at 10 EST. If you have problems logging in, we can talk you through it on the comment section.

Ok have at these guys.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Zack Stovall Wins GRH Fantasy Football Before It Begins, Mounts Steed of Valor and Glory


ST. LOUIS -- Local man for all seasons Zack Stovall has triumphed over a field of paltry ne'er-do-wellers in the annual Ghost of Roy Hobbs Fantasy Football Tourney 2009, the only contender in FF history to win prior to a down being played in the NFL.

"It was tough," said a glisteningly sweaty Stovall, as four buxom female virgins wiped his noble brow. "I mean the field was really competitive. While it was never really in doubt, I feel like I did my best, and the best man won."

"I'm just happy to have another blip on my already outstanding C.V.; I hope others can be inspired by my bevy of accolades."

Long-time friend and beloved associate of Stovall, known only as 'Icehouse,' said that Stovall's triumph is just one of the reasons he's the most well-liked and popular guys he's ever met.

"I mean, you'd like to assume that it's his washboard abs, chisled jawline, not to mention his flawless sense of style, that got him to where he is today," said House. "But you'd be only partly correct; He just gives so damn much. I can't wait to try for second place, if Zack hasn't already won the silver, too."

A tearful Steve Lattimer admited his burning jealousy at the latest Stovall victory, but also admitted that he would gladly take a bullet for the victor.

"I can't say I hate him, I just can't," said a blubbering Lattimer, through snot and tears. "He's just so good. He is just a poem in flesh."

But what's next for the intrepid young champion of the internets?

"I'm looking into a pretty viable non-profit to build rollercoasters in under-privaleged schools," said a magnanimous Stovall. "You know, what ever I can do to help."


-------

You're not going to let this portly sack of snake excriment win, are you? Sign up for the GRH Fantasy Football Showdown and put the Rosie-O'Donnell-look-a-like and his husky jeans in their rightful place at the bottom of the barrell.

Go to Yahoo.com's Fantasy Football folder and fill in the following info:

ID= 638653
Password=GRH

It's just. that. easy. honkies.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Hey What's Up?


Hey what's up? I'm Peyton Manning.

You may have recognized me from the many commercials I'm in.

However, you may not know that I'm ALSO an NFL quarterback. But that's not important.

You're friendly writers from GRH have hired me to promote their first annual GRH fantasy football league.

Never played before? Don't worry it's no big deal.

Luckily for GRH Yahoo decided to come out of sucktown and provide free live scoring along with their user friendly format.

AWESOME!!!

So here's what you do, go to yahoo and create a profile. You may have done this for the March Madness bracket, but it's always fun to create some random email address.

Anyway after that you go to fantasy football and punch in the vitals.

ID= 638653
Password=GRH

If you're unfamiliar with the scoring, you can easily look over it once you log in for your team, however I think Icehouse put it best. "We reward everything awesome that happens on the field."

Don't worry about the draft date, we can figure that out as we get closer to the season.

What's in it for you? Well for the most part this is a fun league where team names and drafting favorite players will take precedent, however the winner will also receive a congratulatory post from one of us.

Either way it will be a great way to waste fall Sundays and totally kick ass!!!