IT'S OFFICIAL: 2010 is the year of the douchebag. Think about it. Outside of the Saints winning the Super Bowl, every single thing that happened in Sports was just one douchebag after another. Cam Newton, Auburn faithful, and SEC hegemony is just the icing on the cake of douche.
But honestly with the insane amount of money Phil Knight has given to Oregon, I want the world to know that you can't buy a championsh.....Oh wait.
That's the next reason I wan't Auburn to win. I wan't the hypocrisy of the NCAA on full display to the world. Furthermore, seeing Auburn win would cause a moral and ethical dilemma for everyone in the SEC. Do you want to Chant SEC (west) SEC (west) knowing full well Cam was signed sealed and delivered. Do you hope for the vacated wins later on so you can still use the "we beat you on the field" argument? Can you handle a year of Auburn Fans gloating every chance they get?
watching this would be like watching a sick psych experiment.
Weekend is here and the first thing everyone needs to do is go on a fantastic voyage....with a hover round.
Whenever I'm at parties or weddings people ask me to dance. I tell them I don't dance, i simply do football agility drills to the beat of the music. People thought I was crazy until now.
Icehouse is probably the best half court shooter I know, but I think he may have some competition.
Remember my advice on not making college rap videos? Just an FYI but that DOES apply to sororities. Who doesn't like Baylor KKG? Flavor. Flavor and self respect.
Finally, the BCS championship is on the horizon. If there's one thing I'll say it's that never ever underestimate the insanity of SEC fans. I don't know what I would do without you, you crazy lovable bastards.
One is famous because he's the much ballyhooed, seldom successful quarterback. He's also rich, white and hasn't found a better job in DC yet (they're hiring!), making him a rarity in Baltimore. The other is famous because of a movie where Sandra Bullock befriends a minority with a heart of gold (also a rarity in Hollywood!).
Enter the beauty queen. Hollow? Yes. Superficial? Yes. Hard-hitting and in-depth interviewer? Um. No.
Joe Flacco:
Michael Oher:
Now, some people would have preferred a Miss South Carolina moment of rambling incoherence, but I'm happy with the videos as they are.
What are their favorite spots in Baltimore? The gym, because that's where they get paid and fuck every other part about that city. Both players are wearing aprons. The video appears to be shot and edited by a six-year-old. Just keep nodding, Miss Maryland. They're bound to respect your journalism that way.
Flacco is baffling in how boring he is. He is as exciting as a blank legal pad sitting on a gray carpet in an empty room. His video is nothing short of awful.
Oher at least has a personality and tries to show it, but Miss Maryland seems to be confused and frightened that she is talking to Michael Oher and not Quinton Aaron, so she inexplicably lets some dude interview him. That's closet racism in the flesh people!
One way or another, these videos are the worst things I've seen involving professional athletes, but it's for a good cause, so what the fuck.
Following his unprecedented 14-0 undefeated season it seems that the fantasy maestro has brought another title home to Lattimerland in the highly competitive and exclusive ESPN (Gamblingdogfightingsteroids) league.
GRH was granted an exclusive interview with the winning manager following his second consecutive title victory.
On the difficulty of repeating as champion following his undefeated season
I think a lot of teams (following a title) expect to come out and win every game. One thing I stressed to my players was the fact that everyone would be gunning for us and that we can't go out there with show up talent.
We expect to win, but we have to pay the price.
This league is extremely competitive and we have teams like "Titty Bar Cold Cock" who rarely check his lineup, yet still wins two games. You also have "The High Life" and "GoPlaxYourselfRonMexico" who can and will beat any team in the league on any given Sunday.
The turning point in the season I think it's when we lost to "Team Smith"....The guy who doesn't show up to the draft (even though he says he will) and still puts together a competitive team. When you lose to a team like that you really have to look yourself in the mirror and ask if you really want it.
How do you handle the legacy of being the only undefeated team to ever play in the league?
Mercury Morris is one of my big undefeated team heroes so I typically try to be a big asshole about it.
On Aaron Rodgers taking over as leader of the team
Well filling in for an undefeated team and Peyton Manning is a tough task for anyone. I told Aaron to just play his game. I've normally been a coach that relies on the running game, but we decided to open it up this year with Aaron, DeSean, and Dwayne. (Bowe) I think as a coach you build around your players and not the other way around. I also think that our backups were outstanding. If you think back to the semifinals we had to beat "Davis is Gay" and Matt stepped in like the pro he is.
What was it like going against your arch rival "Choda Pinchers"?
It's a great experience, I mean we both started the league, and we were roomates together. We really grew up together in the fantasy world and we still talk fantasy on a regular basis. I mean I have all the respect in the world for choda pinchers they once stood up a formal date in order to make a baseball draft so it feels good to beat such a committed team.
People claiming an easy win because 3 of the choda pinchers players did not start?
no comment.
How will the league react if the NFL CBA goes under and the NFL is forced into a lockout year?
Again as commissioner of gamblingdogfightingsteroids I cannot comment on that particular issue at this time.
Ed. At this point in the interview we asked Lattimer about the controversial scoring system used in gamblingdogfightingsteriods. Lattimer left the room throwing chairs and screaming (sic) "You media fucks always try to make up some fucking story about stupid bullshit.
Upon reterning we asked Lattimer about his record in the GRH league to which he replied; "Fuck that league"
Do you consider your team a dynasty?
(laughs) gosh gee golly, I dunno. That's for ya'll to figure out. we just try to go out every year, draft the best players, and then if they suck, get better ones.
On how he'll spend the offseason?
Well typically I'll do nothing fantasy (football) related until ESPN sends me the email in August. Champions are made in August.
Any ideas on next year's team name?
Well I went undefeated with "The ErinAndrews Experience" and we won this year with "Cock n Crocks" so we'll probably stick with the sideline reporter/sexual predator theme. Looking at you Tafoya.
This isn't a particularly interesting video, however the narrator/filmer makes it so so awesome.
The guy does a great job of filming all the action and telling us exactly how "fucking" stupid people are for trying to drive up this hill.
Yet, he never once helps ANYBODY in this situation, even though he knows exactly what to do. Which got me wondering. How would you react in a low level crisis?
I know that I love bailing out people in snow storms. "Oh you're stuck at the library, sure I'll ride over with my 4X4 and shovel of freedom...the complimentary hot chocolate is on me" However, the sheer stupidity and chaos of this situation is oh so intriguing.
So what do you do? Captain America? Steven SpeilberG? Or the crazy lady who stares out her window and calls the police in anything is remotely out of order?
Alternate option. Best thing to do during a snowpocolypse. My choice is driving. Anywhere. That or snow forts, snow forts rule.
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