Caption Contest!

We're finally right in the middle of Spring. NBA Playoffs start this weekend, and baseball season is a go. It's going to be good. Now let's get some much needed captions to these pictures.

First up, Tiger and Big Ben, hamming it up.


Next, Deshawn Stephenson gets his pong on.


And finally, Pau Gasol explains something to Phil Jackson.


These are some of the best pictures we've had in a while. Have at it.

THE NBA IS BACK

NO MORE BULLSHIT LIKE THIS! NO MORE FUCKING SPECULATION! THEY ACTUALLY PLAY BASKETBALL GAMES THAT MATTER TONIGHT!

Yes. YES. Break out your beers, pick your favorite goon-ass role-player and drink every time he does something. I call JaVale McGee (His Wizards tip off against the Mavericks at 8:30 ET. It's not on nationally).

We also get our first look at the NBA's version of Yankees-Red Sox! The first look at Shaq and LeBron (Shabron if they win, LeBraq if they lose) against the Celtics. OMG! SHEED! Rondo wants a new contract, KG says he's healthy, Paul Pierce still thinks he's the best player in the world, Glen "Big Baby" Davis is out indefinitely after breaking his thumb in a fight, and Jesus Shuttlesworth is himself. DID I MENTION THAT RASHEED WALLACE IS ON THAT TEAM?!

The Clippers get to begin their existential blight of a season without #1 pick Blake Griffin, since he broke his kneecap. Still gotta tune in to the late game, though. They're playing Kobe, Pau, Lamar, RON GODDAMN ARTEST and the rest of the Kardashians.

Elsewhere in Fox Sports local land, we have the playoff match up of the Rockets and Blazers. Lamarcus Aldridge just signed a big extension for the boys from PDX. Tracy McGrady and Yao better pray that Trevor Ariza is half as good as Artest was for them, or they could be looking at not even making the post season.

YES! SPORTS ON TV DURING THE WEEK!

Lakers' Gasol Completely Forgets About Playing in Game 3 Tonight

LOS ANGELES — While the L.A. Lakers are in Orlando reviewing game plans, relaxing, and otherwise preparing to win their third-straight game against the Magic, they are missing a notable name to their roster: FC Pau Gasol.

Gasol, according to sources close to the Spaniard, completely forgot about catching the flight to Orlando, Game 3, and the Orlando Magic altogether.

"I don't not know," yawned Gasol in garbled Spanish. "I play PS3. I drink beerz. I not no think about Kobe, shave, or basketbol."

Gasol, shirtless, then curled his seven-foot-frame into a ball on his couch, and proceeded to finish his nap.

Gasol apperently made plans to go see The Hangover with his brother Marc, of the Memphis Grizzlies, and eat a quick dinner at a Jack in the Box afterward. The planning, according to Marc, was all a matter of having nothing better to do.

"He completely forgot," said Marc Gasol. "But then again, so did I. And everyone knows I'm the better Gasol."

Marc Gasol attempted to cement this claim by drooling immediately before ending the interview with the reporter by sneezing and farting at the same time, and thereby chortling uncontrollably.

Caption Contest!

Kobe: Don't you hate pants?!

or...

Kobe: Hey Doc! Medic! Pau's sleeping with his eyes open again!

or...

Pau: Just once, I wish that you pass me the ball.
Kobe: NEVEEERRRR!

Pau and Jordan Farmar have both recently complained about not getting the rock enough. The Lakeshow are 2-2 against the Sticky Nuggs going back to LA. Have fun with this one.

Caption Contest!

Yes indeed, yes indeed. It's a new Wednesday and a new Caption Contest!

Tim: THERE CAN ONLY ONE HIGHLANDER!!!

Or maybe this.

Pau: "Hey! Hey where'd you go?!"

Tim: "Pickaboo!"

Pau: "Ohh! There you are!"

Or perchaps...

Pau: "Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena. Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena. Dale a tu cuerpo alegria, Macarena. Heeeeey Macarena! Aiyy!"

Tim: "I just scored a three-point J."

Pau: "Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena. Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena. Dale a tu cuerpo alegria, Macarena. Heeeeey Macarena! Aiyy!"

Hobbers — Now, go do that voodoo that you do so well.