TELL ME WHAT IS UP IN THE NAME OF GLORIOUS LEADER

SALUTATIONS, CAPITALIST DRONES. I, JONG TAE-SE HAVE BEEN DECIDED BY THE GLORIOUS LEADER KIM JONG-IL TO ADDRESS YOU.

HOW ARE YOUR PITHY LIVES OUTSIDE OF PARADISE? SATISFACTORY, I HOPE, BUT I KNOW THAT YOUR LIVES ARE MEANINGLESS WITHOUT THE SUNSHINE AND HAPPINESS BESTOWED BY KIM JONG-IL, DEFENDER OF THE PEOPLE. SURE, YOU MAY ATTEMPT TO FILL THAT VOID WITH "FREE WILL," "RELIGION," AND "LARGE BREASTED WOMEN," BUT WE ALL KNOW THESE ATTEMPTS ARE FUTILE AND YOU ALL WILL FAIL!

CRUMBLE BEFORE MY MIGHT!

GLORIOUS LEADER HAS ALLOWED ME TO TAKE MY FOOTBALLING CAREER TO THE SECOND GREATEST LEAGUE IN THE WORLD, JAPAN'S J-LEAGUE. AS I AM THE GREATEST PLAYER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD (OUTSIDE OF KIM JONG-IL, WHO INVENTED THE GAME), THE FOOLISH IMPERIAL SERVANTS OF THAT DOWNTRODDEN COUNTRY PAY ME HANDSOMELY. I DESPISE THE VERY SIGHT OF MONEY, SO I SPEND IT ALL ON NINTENDOS, IPODS, NIKES, AND CARS. YOU EVEN FAIL AT INFECTING ME WITH WEALTH, ASSHOLE GOD-FEARING JAPANESE! YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT AND YOUR LEAGUE WOULD BE USELESS WERE IT NOT FOR KIM JONG-IL'S CHARITY OF GRACING YOU WITH MY PRESENCE!

COMMENCE LAUGHTER!

WE ARE THE BEST PREPARED TEAM IN THE HISTORY OF ANY WORLD CUP. WE KEEP OURSELVES ISOLATED FROM LAZY FAT CAPITALISTS. YOUR TEETH, SHOES, POTABLE WATER AND ADEQUATE FOOD SUPPLY DIMINISH YOUR WORK ETHIC! WE PRACTICE THROUGH THE NIGHT BEHIND OUR BARBED WIRE. IT IS TO KEEP YOU OUT, NOT US IN! WE ARE FREE AND HAPPY BECAUSE OF OUR GLORIOUS LEADER!

IF YOU HOLD ENOUGH FAVOR WITH THE GLORIOUS LEADER AND DEFENDER OF THE PEOPLE TO HAVE AN INTERNET CONNECTION, USE THIS AS AN OPEN THREAD FOR TODAY'S GAMES!

JOIN ME OR DIE! CAN YOU DO ANY LESS?!?!

Monday Morning S--t Storm

I was thinking the other day, wouldn't it be cool if I could see some more random sports on TV?

Let me give you an example.

When I was a kid we use to play this game called "Yellow Fever"
The game had simple rules.
1. Take a tennis ball and mark it.
2. Acquire a tennis racket.
3. Designate a "King"
4. All others close their eyes and lay flat on the ground.
5. The "King" hits the tennis ball.
6. First one to find the tennis ball and return it back to home base becomes the new King.

Other than that, there are no rules.

Deceit? Fine. Alliances? Common. Violence? Encouraged.

But here's the thing. This would make for great TV. AM I RIGHT!!!!

So for the Shit Storm, we want to hear about any types of sports/games that you want to see go pro.

When I say "go pro" I mean anything that you would want to watch on a weekly basis. (TV)

You can tackle this problem several ways.
1. Make up a sport.
2. Take an existing sport that is not mainstream.
3. Use a theoretical sport....like my first selection.


SPEEDBALL!!!

So let me get this straight. There is a game. Combining aspects of football, soccer,and basketball. Along with body checks, flying spinning kicks, and customizable armor?

Count me the Fuck in.

So for the shit storm tell us the sport/game you want to see go pro.

And just for some strict guidlines, let's keep this to things that are currently not on T.V, so sorry things like Soccer and Tennis are out of the picture.

Storm Begin.