Monday, May 9, 2011

Monday Morning Shit Storm


We're going to make this one short and sweet, so I'm only going to say this ONCE.

Pick any sport and give it a new position. Describe how it would affect the sport and give some particulars on said position. Don't be a douche bag about this.

My pick: I want one guy on each soccer team who can pick the ball up and run it, like in rugby. Let's call him the boulder. This man will be allowed to run unfettered, although be heavily padded, as hand ball rules will still be strictly enforced, and he will incur many a-cleats to his person. It will still behoove the rest of the team to kick it around and shit, but adds a wild card element to the whole thing. "LOOGIT THIS CRAZY GUY JUST SNAGGING IT OUT OF THE AIR AND RUNNING LIKE THE SWEATY-TOOTHED MADMAN HE IS!"

It also has an element of the Seeker from Quidditch in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. So that's dope.

Shit storm: COMMENCE.


  1. American football - Allow the kicker to play on downs as a RB or WR but he'll be the only guy allowed to kick the ball through the goal post but not in a standard fashion. I think this would combine Rugby with the Wild Card element we're looking for. PLus it would be damn impressive to see a guy break a tackle with a stiff arm, juke right and punt the ball for a good ol +3

  2. Baseball needs at least a couple of defenders. Basically, defenders would be on the offense's team, and just go out to where the ball was hit and try to keep the other team from getting it in quickly. Sure, it diminishes the value of a home run when a bunt can turn into a triple due to the play of a good defender, but hey, it'd be a lot of chaos.

  3. I've thought about having a position in baseball that was like the libero in volleyball. Basically you could sub the guy at any time/any position on defense. I realize this is essentially what the DH accomplishes, but I'm talking about being able just to throw a guy in at 3rd for a batter, then CF for the next.

    It's a terrible idea because the game would take forever, but it would be neat for maybe like one game.

  4. There should be a guy on the Jai Alai court that can spray people with firehoses.

    Because fuck you, that's why.

  5. Two ideas for football that I don't support but have thought about.

    1. A designated blocking back. They'd have to line up inside the tackle box, and would have the same rules as lineman, but they could line up anywhere in the backfield.

    2. Basically have a guy like in arena league who can use forward motion. However, the 5 yard contact rule is waved against him.