Friday Afternoon Fun Bag!

Hey, there's always basketball season. Right? Right? Sure. Whatever.

I'm headed down to see the Mavs host the Thunder tonight. Should be a pretty wacky time. Have I mentioned that Kevin Durant is the shit? Remember the Durantula drinking game: Drink every time he scores. If he gets 24 in the first half, the game turns into a power hour. Yessssss.

OK. Let's party.

By request from Lattimer, we will post this retread. LSUFreek is well known for his glorious photoshopping. This may be his masterpiece.

(via EDSBS)

Jared Allen's mullet explained.


Amar'e Stoudemire and David Spade? Sure. Whatever.


Monta Ellis could give two shits about your pregame circus shots. It also sounds like he says something about weed at the beginning.


LaDanian Tomlinson is a borderline afterthought on the field. So of course he has cause to dance.


To anybody that doesn't think NBA players hustle, Tyrus Thomas is here to say, "what's up."


Ok. I'm done. You guys make sure you party this weekend. I'll be watching the Mavs, Don Delaware will be watching the Grizz. Also, we are accepting names for a BBQ team that Don Delaware is Captaining. Yours in the comments.

Friday Afternoon Fun Bag!

NOTE: For your next party invite list, remember this picture. Daniel Gibson = red hats and fun. Sash Pavlovic = no fun at all.

Yes. YES. SHIT YEAH!

The blogosphere can kiss my ass, because I'm leaving the earth for a while, taking a sojourn into the ocean. But before that happens, we must get to the links.

First and foremost, if you didn't watch last week's Champion's League Final, you clearly fucked up. Not that it was anything that spectacular, but, you know...


While umbrellas are gay (Thanks, KSK!), umbrellas in hurricane tunnels are nothing but fun.


Political ideologies aside, GRH will give $100 if we can get photographic proof of these guys getting beaten. Republicans and rappers agree on many issues (having guns, getting money, hating gay people), but this video misses the boat completely.


Dwight Howard has reason to be pissed over how much special treatment the Cavs got. In the words of The Game, "Don't you ever leave me out the top ten, you fucking bastards."


Dear TechnoViking,
The gauntlet has been thrown down. The question is now you and what army?


Holy crap this is an awesome funbag. See y'all sorry sacks next week.

Bernard Pollard is Not a Cold-Hearted Bastard

There has been all sorts of crazy talk lately about injuries in the NFL, specifically ...you know. In the wake of the most inevitable of comeuppances towards a franchise's following's hubris, people have been heaping massive amounts of praise on the "hero," Bernard Pollard. Players that would relish in causing a season-ending injury are dirty, sadistic assholes. Cold-hearted bastards, if you will. I'm here to say, Bernard Pollard is no cold-hearted bastard.

The thing is, I don't even know the guy. He very well may be revelling in his newfound glory. He could be watching replay after replay of the original link, pleasuring himself. But that's not me. I'm not the cynical type that sees a player go down, and begin thinking how great it was that someone got hurt. Granted, I'm not disappointed, per se, that the best player on the New England Patriots got hurt, I just don't automatically assume that the guy who caused the injury was intending to do such a thing, and is proud of himself afterwards. I, being the eternal optimist that I am, see the cat dancing above, and thinking he, a decent person, has a twinge of regret for disabling a fellow footballer. Maybe he doesn't even think about that play, and is just upset that his team lost. Wouldn't that be noble?

Which brings me back to my original point. Every time you hear someone praise Bernard Pollard for injuring Tom Brady, that person is saying, "I'm proud of him for all the wrong reasons." Or more accurately, "I'm an insufferable prick who likes seeing other people be cold-hearted bastards." So for the first time in the entire blogosphere, I'm here to say that Bernard Pollard is not a cold-hearted bastard.

But I'm still glad it happened.