More wackiness! So much wackiness! Comment your asses off! Then go visit zackstovall.com for more funny!
Walton: "Shaquille, I just wanted you to know that watching you play is like watching the ballet of planets in our solar system. You are massive in scope, but beautiful in form and function." Shaq: [yawns] "Sorry what were you saying?"
Isiah: "I'm telling you Bill baby, it's easy money. All you gots to do is convince those chicks you coached in Detroit that you're doing them a service by providing security and peace of mind to them. You'll love the lifestyle, my man." Laimbeer: "You're telling me pimping is the only way you'll tell me where you got that coat?"
Phelps: "What's up LeBron? We gonna party tonight?" LeBron: "I'm going to party. We are not. Now go get me a Gatorade."
Ok. Magnificent. Yours in the comments. Get busy on them.
At least somebody had some fun this week. Well... maybe two people had fun. Both of these guys kick ass. /adjusts bandages on wrists. //rubs balm on ropeburns around neck
Ok. All better. Ready to get funky. Going to need a lot of booze in the system to keep myself from freezing this week. /tries to kill self again for making joke about cold weather since EVERY PERSON IN THE WORLD DID THAT THIS WEEK.
Fuck it. Let's just watch some videos and get nasty.
Dempsey better be a starting forward for the Yanks this summer. On the reals.
Mainly because this guy licks ass in big games. This was pretty hilarious, though.
While we're on the subject of the World Cup, Italy sucks.
Team Flight Club put up this epic compilation of the best non-NBA dunks. It's exactly what you think it is.
Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Walton Bill Wa...
Ok. That's it from me. Remember to put on enough layers to keep your core warm, but not so many layers that you can't get naked within ten seconds. Eleven seconds is just too long.
Quite the shame, really. He was certainly missed last year as he struggled with back pain.
Some people hate on Bill Walton, which I just don't get. As far as color-commenting went, he was hilarious. He was also kind of the anti-Van Gundy in that he might disparage the same people for the same reasons, but without the fast-talking eastern pentameter. Walton was a sage of the court, the original roundball flower child.
Given to hyperbole, absolutes and favoritism, it was plenty of fun to listen to all the different ways that he could come up with to say that someone was good at basketball. A few of my favorites: -"Andrei Kirilenko is the best 3-on-1 fast break player in the NBA." -"Charlie Ward is the best in-bounds passer in the history of basketball." -“John Stockton is one of the true marvels, not just of basketball, or in America, but in the history of Western Civilization!”
The same could be said about him saying bad things about people as well. For instance, I apparently have seen "the two worst shots in the proud history of the Houston Rockets." Thanks, Cuttino Mobley!
His announcing during any international contest was fantastic, as he would just open up the wikipedia page of any given country and start spouting off GDP statistics, or the interesting topography of Argentina, for instance.
He loved Rock n' Roll and Basketball, in that order. Luke Walton once said that his earliest memory is Jerry Garcia running naked around his dad's backyard teepee. That teepee must have been a muhfuckin party.
As the final eulogy of the greatest sports announcer in the history of television, I will say three resounding renditions of, "Todd MacCullough throw it down throw it down," and "Amare Stoudemire! Winner of the genetic lottery!"
As much as I like hip hop Van Gundy, I'm going to miss Bill Walton.
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